Understanding. The value which has no definite meanings but of variable concepts.. Ask anyone about the definitions and u'll get variably different kinds of answers!! (Usually people will give the experience-based-answer...yeah~ no objections!! Experience is always the best teacher, they say).. And please note, different person comes with different experience, it will never ever be the same (read: in magnitude)...again, they say...

Understanding is not a single practice, neither nor a talent.. It is a manner that needs more than one creature to exist in this so-called world; a manner to be built up when one involves or interacts with another one or two or three or more...

One needs not a textbook full of written lame words about "understanding", needing not of memorizing as it is to be learnt in different stages of life.. When one was a baby, one learnt to put trust on one's mother, one learnt the surroundings and the people's around...And once one had learnt, one kept those lessons in mind and prepared for the "application phase" as one grew and grew older...That's the rule of mental+physical development... where the balance on both sides is crucially needed...

"Time teaches us many things...we wont be of what we are today if we didnt grow up ^_^.."

HOW?? HOW?? HOW??

Oh, how do we do this?? How to understand? Here are some examples from Stephen R Covey's famous Habit 5; Seek First To Understand, Then To Be Understood... (just a simple sharing with u, friends!!)..

adeh...camana ni...

VERSI MELAYU, ok?? =P

Situasi 1

Korang ade masalah penglihatan dan memerlukan khidmat optometrist (betul kah?) utk check mata korang dan buat la something utk betulkan balik korang punye ke"blur"an...
Makanya, korang pegi ke sebuah kedai mata (haha...ntah ape)....

Korang : Penglihatan sy blur sejak akhir2 ni...
Optometrist : Oh senang je, sy pun pernah mengalaminya, dan sekarang tdk lg sbb sy pakai cermin mata ni...cuba awk pakai cermin mata ni jgk... Sy pasti 100% penglihatan awk takkan blur lg..

Tanpa menyoal panjang, korang pn try la pakai spek tuh...

Korang : Apekah?? Tak bekesan pun...makin teruk ada la...
Optometrist : Eh, iyokah?? Cuba pakai nye betul2...Sy confirm mesti jd punya spek ni.. Sbb sy pakai spek ni, penglihatan sy bertambah baik...
Korang : Siyes, makin teruk dr tak pakai...
Optometrist : Dasar tatao bersyukur, pakai betul2 la...jadiknye....

THE END
(p/s: watak dan jalan cerita hanya rekaan semata2, tade kaitan ye ngn org idup n org yg tlh mati)

Persoalannya, adakah anda semua mempunyai perasaan walau sekelumit untuk pegi ke kedai itu lagi??? Tidak, bukan??

The point here is-----------> DIAGNOSE @ SEEK

"We couldn't prescribe medications if we don't have the diagnosis, could we?"

Well...well...
How do we diagnose?
How do we seek?

to achieve those..is by LISTENING!!

Listen? Listen? (and again) Listen?
Yes, the very fundamental in understanding.
We want to diagnose, we have to listen to the patient's history.
We want to seek, we have to listen to one's problem.. (Hey! Is it a skill?)

Does anyone here know how to listen? (i mean the real "listen", not a mere one)

Well..not all person can listen well to another person... It is, for me..quite a skill.. like reading and writing... People learnt to read and write (in primary school, basically)...but they forgot of how important to learn to listen too...

How is it to listen to others? Is it something like u keep listening to ur friend's problem and do nothing? Or by adding "oo ye ke?", "pastu mcm mane?", et cetera and et cetera phrases while listening?? It depends.. but the most important is to listen to them...by being judging-and-justifying-free listeners... (gaining trust of other people who tend to be open with us)...

Jadiknya...apekah masalah kita sekarang?? Are we good listeners to our friends???
Mari tinjau situasi ni...(juga adaptasi dr buku si stephen covey)

Mak : Come on, honey.. bgtau mak ape masalah kamu.. Mak tau ianya susah...tp mak akan cuba utk memahami...
Anak : Tatao la mak... Mak mesti fikir ianya biasa dan bodo2 je..
Mak : Oh, tentulah tidak... Kamu boleh bgtahu mak, syg... Sape lagi yg amik berat pasal kamu selain mak.. Ape yg buat kamu sedih ni??
Anak : Taktau lah mak...
Mak : Come on honey...What is it?
Anak : Sebenarnya, sy tak suka dan tak berminat nk g skolah lagi...
Mak : Apa?? Apa maksud kamu taknak gi skolah lagi? Setelah ape yg mak dan bapak kamu berpenat lelah carik makan carik duit utk kamu belajar!! Belajar ni penting utk masa depan kamu! Kamu nak jd mcm abg dan kakak kamu?? Kami dh suruh kamu settle down... Kamu ada kebolehan...kamu hanya kena guna je... Think positive k, honey...u can do it..

PAUSE.

See???
Are we good listeners?
We tend to justify their position at the first place rather than just listen and understand their situation...understand how they feel...and what makes they feel like that....or in other words, being in their shoes, like we are they...we ARE having the same problem...

So, last but will never ever be the least.....i am here to apologize to my friends (yang tahu kewujudan blog ni... Kak Wani, Ain, Aisyma, dan Amal..)... sorry for not being a good friend and a good listener to u, gals... and sorry also for being a bit moody lately... and sorry also for not sharing the problem... it had already been dealt.. Thank you for ur concerns and cares~ (^^,)~

p/s:
1. Kak Wani...mari kita stdy!!!! \(^o^)/...
2. Ain jgn tensi ye ok~ sile bertenang lambang ketenangan itu rahmat Allah.. esoknya berjalan lancar insyaAllah...AGM6
3. Aisyma sile bersedia lambang akan naik jadik lah ape2...tp itu adalah tgjawab yg besar..PERMAI08/09
4. Amal bakpo x make lakso pine nyo.....haha....